Thursday, 10 July 2014

This is a book blog.

This is a book blog. I am a book blogger. 

As a book blogger, I have really enjoyed becoming a part of the book blogging community, I feel like I've finally found a place where I fit in and that means a lot to someone like me. I can't thank some of you enough for making me feel welcome in this little corner of the internet. 

However, there are some people who have made me feel not so welcome, and have kind of shunned me away. I don't really know why this is and I'm not going to mention any names, but I think that if those people read this post then they'll know who they are. The main reason I think is because people often don't acknowledge this as a book blog. 

This blog originally started off with some very random posts but then by the time August came around I had transformed this completely into a book blog. Since then all of the posts have been about books. There is the occasional more personal posts and I did some Christmassy posts around Christmas but the reason I did those posts is because I'd like you to get to know me better as a blogger. I feel that because I started off not knowing that book blogs actually existed and then turning this into a book blog that I have been pushed away.

This is the part where I'm worried that I might loose friends that I've made through blogging, but I feel that what I say in the next few paragraphs are things that I NEED to say. 

I'm not one who particularly cares whether A DayDreamer's Thoughts isn't someone else's favourite blog. But there is a point when I do feel fairly cut off and here is an example of this point.

About a eight months ago I sent a message to a fellow book blogger asking them if they'd be interested in doing a button swap. They later messaged back saying that they only did button swaps with friends or if they thought the blog was good. I found that kind of rude given that I communicated very frequently with them (and still do) and I hugely admired them as a book blogger. This has happened with a few other bloggers as well. Then a few months ago they created a page with all the blogs they'd recommend and every book blogger that I communicate with was on that list, every book blogger I know, except me and that really, really hurt. 

This has happened many times - people creating lists of bloggers, and I honestly don't think it's right. Button swaps yes - but listing blogs that you claim are "amazing", whilst those are your opinions - and I appreciate that - I know I'm not planning to make one anytime soon as I know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of this.  There are a lot of times where I just feel like I'm very excluded and isolated in this world, and it feels horrible.

I'm not saying that another book blogger has to like my blog, but I'd really appreciate it if they didn't go out of their way to project the fact that they don't respect me as a book blogger and don't respect my blog as a book blog. Time and time again I've been excluded from things or not even been asked about being included in something and I get the impression that it's because those bloggers don't think this is a book blog. 

Another thing I want to point out is tweets. Seriously, I love twitter, as it has helped me get to know other bloggers. Recently I noticed, there are some bloggers that if you tweet them, they COMPLETELY ignore you, and it's probably not always a case of not seeing the tweet, it's that they don't even want to try to get to know you.

I'm sick of it. Honestly, I've always said how grateful I am to the book blogging community and I've made some great friends through blogging but I've truly had enough of feeling so cut off. The reality is that I've grown up being excluded from things and was bullied for 7 consecutive years. I now suffer from severe anxiety and feel very depressed at times as a result of what has happened. I've not been bullied through blogging but that sort of negativity from other bloggers has been projected onto me and for those who haven't experienced that; you have no idea how much it hurts. To me, book blogging has given me a place where I belong, but the attitude and rudeness that I've experienced with some bloggers; not accepting this blog, and ignore has made me feel like once again I don't belong anywhere.

So here is what I propose:

  • New blog name: I'm stuck between two at the moment but I'll hopefully decide soon. Obviously along with this will come a new blog button.
If anyone has any ideas for blog names then please let me know.

  • Deleting old posts: This is going to be a painful process as it shows how far I've come, but I need to get rid of all non-book related posts. Maybe with a bit of blogging magic I'll be able to transform those old posts into bookish ones.
  • Talking more to bloggers: There are some bloggers that I'd like to talk to more but I feel like they're some of the people who really ignore me. So I'm going to try, I really am but there is a point where it just feels too much.
That's what I wanted to say, and I'm sorry if anyone feels differently about me now that I've said this, but this is how I feel and I'm fed up of feeling alone. I really recommend that you also read Amber's survey results on what people think of the book blogging community. I know that at least 2 comments there are mine, and there are some others that are very similar and highlight how I feel.

Holly x

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